Divorcing a Spouse Who Refuses to be Amicable

It’s all well and good to believe that you and your spouse can divorce in a way that is civil, if not friendly. Some people actually do move through the process of divorce without fighting and arguing. It’s not necessarily the exception to the rule, but it’s important to remember that just because you want your divorce to be civil doesn’t mean that your soon-to-be ex feels the same way.

How in the world are you supposed to get through a divorce when all your spouse wants to do is make it as hard on you as it can be? Here are some tips to help you deal with a spouse that wants to make your divorce process as difficult as possible.

1. Stay Focused

Don’t buy into your spouse’s drama. You are getting a divorce for a reason, and you most likely have a plan for your life post-divorce. Stay focused on the goals you have for yourself. Don’t bite the bait that your spouse dangles in front of you. It’s not going to be worth it in the end. When your spouse tries to start an argument, stay calm and turn your mind to what things will look like when you are single again.

2. Keep Your Feelings Quiet

You may believe that you can reason with your spouse. Unfortunately, it is often the case that your spouse is impossible to reason with. Don’t get into any conversation about how you felt before or during your marriage. In particular, you should definitely avoid any conversation about how you are feeling regarding the divorce. Don’t apologize to your spouse for the way they are feeling because anything you say could potentially be used against you in court.

3. Don’t Expect Resolution

You may believe that things between you and your spouse can be resolved, but those chances are slim. Try to stay realistic. Remember that a divorce isn’t some sort of game with winners or losers. You won’t get everything that you want and neither will your spouse. That is true in divorce court and in your personal life. You may want to establish a friendly relationship with your spouse, but you should be prepared to accept that it may never happen.

4. Make Sure You are Protected

In many cases, a spouse may simply be angry and unable to control their emotional outbursts. In some cases, a spouse can be dangerous. If you find yourself in a position where you believe that your spouse may be able to harm you, make sure that you are protected. Open a new bank account that your spouse doesn’t have access to, change the locks to your home and switch your social media settings to private.

If you believe that you are in physical danger, legal protections are readily available. Speak with your divorce attorney about filing for a protection order through family court. You may have to give a testimony or provide other evidence before a protection order is granted.

Not all divorces are amicable, but your divorce attorney should be able to guide you through the process no matter the circumstances. Call our officee today if you need assistance with a divorce in Orlando. We will speak to you at no cost to determine how we can best help you.

About the Author
Andrew Nickolaou, Esq., B.C.S., is a founding partner at Bernal-Mora & Nickolaou, P.A. He practices almost exclusively in divorce, marital and family law. Andrew and his partner, Ophelia Bernal-Mora, Esq., B.C.S., joined forces in March 2016 to form the unique and boutique husband and wife family law team at Bernal-Mora & Nickolaou, P.A. Together, Andrew and Ophelia take a practical and team-based approach to all of their cases and clients to deliver the highest quality experience and representation.