Going through a divorce is hard for adults, but it can be even more stressful for children. As you go through your divorce, try to keep this in mind. Taking care of your little ones during the split will play an important part on their emotional health. If you and your spouse are calling it quits, here are some tips for helping your children cope. Note that these some of tips may not apply if you are divorcing your spouse due to abuse or to get out of some other terrible situation.
1. Be Real
Don’t make up fanciful stories in an attempt to make the divorce sound like something it’s not. If you can do so without arguing, both you and your spouse should sit down with the kids and discuss the pending divorce. Be sure that you speak in plain, truthful language that your kids can understand.
Your children may worry that one parent will love them less if they aren’t living together full time. Reassure your children that this is not the case. A schedule that kids can see is often helpful. Put days with mom and days with dad on the calendar so that your children can keep track for themselves.
3. Talk About Emotions
Make sure that your children understand that it is natural to be angry or sad. Let your kids know that dealing with emotions on their own can be tough and that you and their other parent are always available to talk to them about their feelings. Your children may try to keep their feelings bottled up so that they don’t upset you. Let them know that the divorce is upsetting for everyone involved, but that it in no way means they can’t talk to you.
4. Not At Fault
You may need to tell your kids over and over again that the divorce is not their fault, depending on their age. Small children tend to believe that the world centers around them, through no fault of their own, and may need constant reminders that the divorce has nothing to do with their behaviors or actions.
5. Stay Positive
It’s going to be hard during the divorce and immediately after, but be sure to speak positively about the other parent. There is nothing positive in pitting the children against one or the other. Children love their parents and shouldn’t feel as if they are being forced to choose or take sides. Allow your children to help decorate the new place of the spouse who leaves the home. This can help children feel like a part of something exciting and make them feel at home more quickly.
Divorcing is a difficult thing for everyone involved. Don’t forget that your children are feeling a wide range of emotions during this stressful time. If you need assistance with divorce or other family law matters in Orlando, reach out to our team. We will talk with you at no cost and advise you of the legal options that pertain to your situation. Reach out to us today for more information or to schedule your consultation.