Ways to Promote Positive Co-Parenting After Divorce

Divorce is difficult under the best and simplest of circumstances. When you factor children into the mix, things can quickly get logistically and emotionally complex. Regardless of how messy your divorce was, you are forever tied to your child’s other parent. Co-parenting means having both parents play an active role in the lives of their children. 

Research has consistently shown that the quality of the relationship between two parents can have a significant impact on the mental and emotional well-being of children. While co-parenting after divorce is often easier said than done, maintaining a positive parenting relationship with your ex can play a big role in the happiness of your children.

How to Promote a Positive Co-Parenting Relationship

It may not come naturally, but working to promote a positive co-parenting relationship after divorce can benefit everyone involved, not just the children. Working together with your former spouse can not only reduce the stress put on your children, but it can reduce your own stress and anxiety as well. In order to promote this positive relationship, it is important to do your part in supporting the other parent’s relationship with your children. Promoting a solid relationship between the other parent and your children keeps things positive. 

Supporting the other parent means following the agreed-upon parenting schedule and being as accommodating as you can. Think cooperation. In order to cooperate, you are likely going to need to compartmentalize a bit. Any anger or resentment you feel toward your former spouse needs to be set aside. Think of them as the parent of your child as opposed to your ex.

Setting aside any negative feelings about your former spouse will also be helpful in how you talk about them, especially when your children are around. Children hear so much more than we think and they also pick up on how we treat other people, especially if they have a relationship with that person. Remaining respectful towards your former spouse will do so much good in promoting and maintaining a positive co-parenting relationship. It also helps protect your children from feeling as though they are in the middle of conflict and need to choose sides.

It is also important to maintain quality communication with your co-parent. While you may not want to chat on the phone daily, it is a good idea to have regular co-parenting “check-ins.” This may be via a phone call, emailing, or an in-person meeting; whatever works best for you and your co-parent. This open channel of communication means that you regularly are working together to talk about your children and address any logistical problems or other concerns that you may have.

With all of this, you must remember to take care of yourself. Having and maintaining a positive co-parenting relationship will be difficult and even next to impossible if you are not maintaining a positive relationship with yourself. Taking care of yourself means that you are best equipped to take care of your children. Do not take your physical and mental well-being for granted. Practice self-care whenever possible.

Orlando Divorce Attorney

At Orlando Family Team, we want to see your family thrive after divorce. This may seem difficult, but it is far from impossible. Our dedicated divorce attorneys will be by your side throughout the divorce process and will always have your best interests at heart. Contact us today.

About the Author
Andrew Nickolaou, Esq., B.C.S., is a founding partner at Bernal-Mora & Nickolaou, P.A. He practices almost exclusively in divorce, marital and family law. Andrew and his partner, Ophelia Bernal-Mora, Esq., B.C.S., joined forces in March 2016 to form the unique and boutique husband and wife family law team at Bernal-Mora & Nickolaou, P.A. Together, Andrew and Ophelia take a practical and team-based approach to all of their cases and clients to deliver the highest quality experience and representation.